What do we do when we feel like quitting horses altogether?
Uncertainty is not good for riders, not good for horses.
It's similar to the feeling that I had when I first started working with my Andalusian. Actually, it wasn't when I first started working with him, it's when things weren't going my way with my horse.
And that's why clarity is critical to our success.
In our Harmony For the Horse Program we guide you in your quest be with certainty so you can ride in balance and ease, and finally reach your highest intentions with your horse.
CLICK HERE to discover more about how we can help you to reach freedom, achievement, oneness and joy that you most seek with your horse.
We need to find a way to help ourselves when we feel like quitting with horses all together. We come across this problem and it's not something that's foreign to horse riders because of the difficulty of riding horses.
What do you do in times of uncertainty? What do you do?
What's your pattern and what's your habit?
Do you run away and hide? Do you get busy?
What do you do, exactly?
Listen To Your Body
The first thing that I want to share with you is to listen to your body. Things like not having any energy or brain fog, or you are always frustrated, not knowing what to do with your horse next.
Quit or Pivot?
Do you actually quit with horses because it's so frustrating, and you're not getting anywhere?
Or do you actually pivot? What do you choose to do?
I experienced this as with my own riding. I became very proficient and was very high level with natural horsemanship. I got to the point where...
I wanted to build a horse that had longevity and to ride a horse that would be sound for as long as he or she lived, or at least have a method of determining soundness, a method of helping and/or an ability to rehabilitate the horse.
I rehabilitated as many horses as I could. Then I took that knowledge and that information and that experience and helped riders and their horses too.
I taught riders in clinics around the world. I was seeing horses that were broken down. In every country that I went to I would see numerous horses that were getting broken down, and the riders too; broken down by their sport or by their art form.
And so I witnessed this, and I decided to make a pivot.
Listen to your body. If your body is telling you these things (that what was happening to me) I was starting to get very frustrated. I had no energy to get out with my horse.
Ask Yourself This Question...
Am I still growing?
Am I bored? Or is my horse bored?
This is where you need to use discernment. Discernment without judgment.
Maybe your purpose has expanded? Maybe you want more results? Or maybe you're looking for improvement?
These are the areas to look at if you want more improvement with your horse.
Are you bouncing in the saddle and you're uncomfortable? Are you not able to do lateral work and do you really want to do lateral work? Are you not able to ride a canter smoothly?
Perhaps your communication or your conversation with your horse? Or your connection or the actual communion with your horse? Do you want to go deeper? Do you want to have a partnership that's a dual partnership, not just one leading the other?
Build Your Sound Horse
Are you getting to the point where you want to be able to help your horse to be better, to move better, to be more sound, to have more longevity? Are you looking to not recreate the mistakes that you've already made, perhaps? Do you have a structure to do that?
That's what I really didn't want to do, I didn't want to make the mistakes that I'd already made. I wanted to have a structure so that I could know that I could go beyond that with whatever horse I was working with, or whatever student I worked with.
Decision Making or Problem Solving
Decision-making or problem-solving with your horse; as a better human, a better rider, a better trainer, any of these levels. Problem-solving is key.
And now it could be one of the areas that I've talked about here, or it could be all of the areas. It just depends on where you are.
A student who came into our program, who was very angry. She was angry about the past that she had with riding instructors. And her anger was so strong that she was actually resentful.
We have a specific way that we help our riders through this...where she was feeling totally helpless, and knew that she was doing everything right and doing everything she was told to do, but was still feeling very helpless.
And so what I want you to do here, and this is what we do with our students as well get a piece of paper, get a pen. And I want you to write down what you are angry about.
TASK #1: Write down specifically what you are angry about
What specifically are you angry about or what are you resentful about?
The student in our program, she was resentful about the past instructors that have led her along the path. She'd spent money and time. Those wasted years of her life investing in these people in the systems that were not helping her and her horse out.
Now you can take control and shift it.
Be very concise, be very specific.
"It makes me feel sick to my stomach, or I want to just go and cry."
If you need to come back time and time again to this training and refer to it, do it!
I want you to write down specifically what's bothering you.
...the details, the behaviors, the traits, the circumstances that bother you.
For example, my horse is spooky when it's raining out? Why does that bother you? How do you feel when that happens?
Emotions + Somatics = Feelings
Do that and then take a break.
TASK #2: Then take a break, clear everything
And when you take a break, go for a walk. This break has to be at least 30 minutes, and be disciplined about it.
TASK #3: Write down what you absolutely love about horses
Write the exercises that you'd like to do, the traits about horses, the behaviors that horses have, the outcomes that you're looking for, the ways that you want to spend time with horses...write those down.
For our student who was in our program, the thing she wrote down is how she loved doing bodywork with her horse. She loved to do dressage. She wanted to get to passage and piaffe, the highest levels of dressage. She wanted to do an endurance ride. She just wanted to make a transition from natural horsemanship to dressage, but she didn't know how to fill that gap.
So these are the things I want you to write down.
This will help you to get more intelligence of what it is that you want to create with your horse.
So you're not going to just do things over and over creating the same thing again...maybe with a different horse that happens so frequently doesn't it?
When someone can't get where they want to get with one horse they get a different horse. And then what they do is just recreate the same thing with that different horse, and that is actually what they were running away from the previous horse.
So creating something from zero with a new horse and then doing it with just a different flavor. I don't want to do that, and I'm sure others don't want to do that either.
So what I've just given you here; this is the decision or the choice framework that we use in our program and that is to help our riders who are stuck, frustrated, overwhelmed, and resentful perhaps of their past, and not getting where they want to get with their horse, or it's taking way too long.
This is going to turn you from a rider who does things by rote into becoming a rider that can take ownership of what you're doing with your horse. Everything that you do with your horse, taking ownership for that, and turning it into something that's sustainable and has longevity, and it's awesome!
So you can build a relationship and results with your horse that really excites you; that can last for the next 5 years, 10 years, 20 years.
You're constantly evolving by using this process that we have in our program.
Our riders are constantly evolving and growing and nurturing themselves and feeling inspired by their horses and not feeling like,
"I've got to get my saddle out.I just don't have enough energy. I just I'm just going to not ride today.”
Do these suggestions that I shared with you in this video because this is how I have reached high levels of horsemanship and classical riding, with numerous horses and numerous students.
You'll get the clarity which enables you to craft these pieces that I've talked about today, where you don't have to just muster up the energy and feel like you've got to put on an alarm clock to go out and ride.
It just happens every day because you're enthusiastic about it!
If you want support to be more excited today than the first day that you decided you wanted to ride horses, and then connect with your horse and get the results that you are yearning for so you can have true success with your horse...
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